Jo Cool Mama

It was a nice day out and a friend of mine called to see if we wanted to hang at the park for a bit so our kids could play. Sounded like a super idea! We all met up at the park and we chatted in the cool shade while the children played on the playground. We watched people come and go with their children - we even helped one lady leave because she felt like she was going to pass out and needed help getting back to her car. Don’t worry - we made sure she was fine to drive! She lived close and just needed to go and rest, but her two-year-old was being a typical kid who did not want to leave - and that’s when she asked for our help. Poor lady - I hope she’s feeling better! Then there was a mother who was standing next to the swings sucking on her cancer stick - thanks lady! It wasn’t until Sam had asked her to push him on the swing that I saw the cancer burning in her left hand. I’ll give her credit for asking me if it was OK to push Sam on the swing and I had said it was, but I hadn’t yet seen the smoke of doom. Then she got into a swing with her daughter and swung with the stupid white trash cigarette hanging out of her mouth! Not to mention Sam was on the swing next to her!

Anyhow - my friend and I chatted and enjoyed the weather when these two characters walked up to the playground in full metal detecting gear looking like two mega nerds who need a life! Coming to a playground in the middle of the day while children were playing to do what? To find what? At one point the male metal detector had heard something in his extra large headphones and the lady metal detector ran over to see - oh, very exciting! The lady reached into her satchel and pulled out a rod of some kind to examine the ground even further. We watched on and waited to see what the heck they were going to pull out of the densely-packed wood chip floor of the playground. They were so into this one spot at one point that they had put down their big fancy looking metal detectors to focus more attention to the dirt. I wondered aloud how one of the mega nerds would have acted if one of the children would have come up and touched their equipment. I mean, the facts are they’re at a playground where small children play, and small children love to touch large flashy things. It was so beyond inappropriate for them to be there while children were playing! At one point I was sitting on the edge of the playground with Jack when the lady waving her metal detector passed by. I was in her path to the fortune she was about to find there on the playground, and I wondered if she was going to walk right over me or go around. She went around and flashed a friendly smile. They didn’t seem mean or anything of that nature, but people become freaky when they have expensive things around children that want to touch… Sam is that kid! I was totally surprised that he didn’t attack them with his thousand “Why?” questions and investigate their equipment with his idle hands.

My friend had said that once before a different man had come to explore the playground with metal detecting gear and it was during the time small children were running around and having fun… Creepy. Strange people need to know their boundaries and going to a park during playtime is not a place to be! I didn’t bring my camera to the park, *bad parenting - wink* so I used my cameraphone to snap a shot of the lady metal detector in action. The picture isn’t great, but like I said it was a camera phone. And, yes - that’s the lady.

To put the cherry on top - while we were walking to our cars, the children running ahead of us almost ran into a couple of teens macking all over one another! We yelled at the children to stop just before they walked in on mommy and daddy there having a good time. We noticed Jack’s shoe had fallen off when we got back to our cars and my friend had gone back to retrieve it. When she got back to the cars she reported that it was worse! She said they were pretty much having s-e-x. In the park, in the middle of the day?! Give me a break - what is wrong with people? So, we can’t take our children to the playground because we have smoking mothers swinging with their children - the cancer stick just hanging out of her mouth! *class* We have strange folks with high tech equipment scanning the playground for the one thing that’s going to make them rich! We have teens having s-e-x for the whole world to see… Then the lazy asses cannot even bother to clean up after themselves! Smoking mom threw her butt on the ground for a toddler to pick up, high tech nerds digging holes and leaving them and teens just think it’s fine to leave the used condoms in the playground! Nice…

On a lighter note - “cute” is what happens when these two kids get together…